We’ve all been there — scrolling endlessly on Instagram, gazing at those perfectly curated lives, wondering why we don’t have what others seem to effortlessly flaunt. It’s easy to get caught up in that cycle, and I’ll admit, I’ve been one of those people. Envy, however uncomfortable, is a real emotion. It’s one of the reasons I’ve found myself needing to take frequent breaks from social media, much to the confusion of my friends.
“Why do you do that?”
“Not gonna lie, that’s weird…”
“I could never do that!”
This habit of mine is so extreme that I even use an app to track how many days it’s been since I last opened Instagram or TikTok. It sounds a bit extreme, but I just can’t seem to avoid the comparisons that hit me when I spend too much time on these platforms.
I know deep down that social media is just a highlight reel — people share only the best moments, and we never see the real struggles or the quiet, everyday life behind the scenes. Yet, even knowing that, it’s hard not to fall into the trap of comparison. The desire for things, experiences, and validation often intensifies, but when I take a step back, away from the constant scrolling, something interesting happens: those burning desires start to fade, and suddenly, I’m filled with gratitude for the life I’m already living.
One day, I came across a quote from an Instagram reel that completely shifted my perspective:
*“Do you actually want it, or do you just want others to see you having it?”*
That question lingered in my mind, and I realized that this concept explained why so many of my desires disappeared once I deleted the app. Here’s what I mean:
- A few months ago, I was obsessed with getting the Polene Cyme bag because I saw it everywhere on Instagram and TikTok. The way it went viral, the way people seemed to rave about it — I just *had* to have it. But now? Honestly, I couldn’t care less. The design seems plain to me now, and the obsession is gone.
– I’m usually perfectly content being single, but after scrolling through my Instagram feed, seeing couples on romantic dates, celebrating anniversaries, or just sharing sweet moments, I found myself craving that kind of companionship. It was almost like I wanted to prove to others that I could have that too.
– I love my quiet introverted life — staying at home, reading, writing. But when I see the wild, adventurous lifestyles my friends post, I can’t help but feel like I should be out there more, doing exciting things. After all, don’t we all want to be seen as living life to the fullest?
– Then there’s the constant cycle of wanting the latest fashion or trends, only to realize that I wanted those things because I wanted to post about them. I wanted to show off my new bag, my perfect relationship, my perfect life — just for the validation.
And don’t get me started on the countless times I’ve done something simply so I could share it on my story. From mountain biking to party buses, from impromptu trips to hanging out with acquaintances I barely knew — I’ve done it all for the ‘gram, not necessarily because I genuinely wanted to, but because I needed proof that my life was interesting enough to share.
While I’m thankful for these experiences and have no regrets, it’s hard to ignore the truth that social media had a hand in motivating me to do things I normally wouldn’t. It pushed me out of my comfort zone, sure. But if I’m being honest, without the pressure to share it with the world, I might’ve been perfectly content staying home, reading a book, or just living my life quietly.
Social media isn’t inherently bad — it can open our eyes to new products, new ideas, and even new experiences. But we need to keep ourselves in check. Next time you feel that urge to buy the latest trend or do something just to post about it, ask yourself: *Do I actually want this, or am I just trying to prove something to others?