I never thought I’d be the guy sitting alone on a Friday night, scrolling through old photos and wondering where everyone went. But here I am, 24 years old, with my first real job, a tiny apartment, and a social life that’s… well, let’s just say it’s seen better days.
Remember when making friends was as easy as sharing your fruit snacks at recess? God, those were the days. Now, it feels like I’m trying to crack some complex code just to grab a coffee with someone who isn’t my roommate or my coworker.
It’s not like I haven’t tried. I’ve done the whole Meetup thing, joined a kickball league (yeah, I know), and even tried to reconnect with old college buddies. But something’s different now. We’re all so… busy. Or at least, that’s what we keep telling each other.
“We should totally hang out soon!” has become the adult equivalent of “I’ll call you” after a mediocre first date. It’s a polite way of saying, “I like the idea of being friends with you, but I’m not going to put in any actual effort.”
And you know what? I get it. I’m guilty of it too. Between work, trying to figure out how to be a “real adult,” and occasionally remembering to call my parents, finding time for friendships feels like trying to fit an extra sock into an already overpacked suitcase.
But here’s the thing that keeps me up at night: What happens when we wake up one day and realize we’ve let all our meaningful connections slip away? When our Instagram feed is full of “friends” we haven’t spoken to in years, and our real-life social interactions are limited to small talk with the barista who knows our coffee order?
I read somewhere that loneliness is as bad for your health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Fifteen! And yet, here we are, a generation more connected than ever through technology, but feeling more isolated than ever in reality.
It’s not just about having people to grab a beer with on the weekends. It’s about having someone to call when life goes sideways. Someone who knows your story, who’s been there through the ups and downs, who can remind you who you are when you forget.
I miss the easy laughter of inside jokes built over years. I miss late-night conversations that veer from the meaning of life to the best way to make ramen noodles actually taste good. I miss the comfort of silences that don’t need to be filled.
So, what do we do? How do we reclaim the art of friendship in a world that seems designed to keep us apart? I wish I had the answers. But maybe admitting that we’re struggling is the first step. Maybe it’s about being brave enough to be vulnerable, to reach out even when it feels awkward.
Maybe it’s about prioritizing people over productivity, choosing connection over convenience. It might mean saying no to that extra shift to say yes to a friend in need. It might mean putting down our phones and picking up the phone to actually call someone.
I don’t know if I’ll ever recapture the easy friendships of my college days. But I do know that I’m not willing to give up on the idea of meaningful connections. Because at the end of the day, isn’t that what makes life worth living?
So here’s to the friends we’ve lost touch with, the ones we’ve yet to meet, and the ones who’ve stuck around despite it all. Here’s to making the effort, to being a little uncomfortable, to choosing people over things.
And if you’re reading this and feeling the same way, know that you’re not alone. We’re all just trying to figure it out, one awkward “want to grab coffee?” text at a time.
Maybe it’s time we start treating friendship like the vital, life-sustaining force it is. Because in this crazy, fast-paced world of early adulthood, having someone to share it with might just be the most rebellious act of all.