Don’t let independence make you forget interdependence.

This was her take on relationships, and it really made me think. “You’re independent, and that’s amazing,” she said, “but don’t let that stop you from leaning on someone when you need to.”

Her point wasn’t that I should depend on my boyfriend or anyone else for validation or happiness, but rather that relationships thrive on balance. “When I was young, we were taught to give too much,” she said, “but now, I see women afraid to give anything at all. Being strong doesn’t mean being untouchable. Strength comes from knowing when to open up and when to hold your ground.”

Her words made me reflect on my own relationship. I’ve always been fiercely independent, but I wonder if, in doing so, I’ve sometimes built walls instead of bridges.

Your time is different, but don’t lose the essence of kindness.

This one hit hard. “Feminism isn’t just about what you fight for; it’s also about how you carry yourself,” she said. “I see so many people trying to prove their worth by being louder, tougher, angrier. But true power comes from kindness, patience, and empathy.”

She wasn’t saying we shouldn’t be assertive or bold. She was reminding me that in trying to stand tall, we shouldn’t lose the softness that makes us human.

She shared a story from her younger days when her colleague, a man, tried to take credit for her work. Instead of calling him out in anger, she calmly presented the facts to her boss. “I let the truth speak for me,” she said, “and he ended up apologizing in front of the entire office.”

Love isn’t about who you are with; it’s about who you become.

This one made me emotional. “In a good relationship, you grow together. You don’t shrink for the other person, and you don’t make them shrink for you.”

She talked about how her relationship with my dad was far from perfect but how they always prioritized growth — both as a couple and as individuals. “There’s no room for ego in love,” she told me. “When you’re with someone, ask yourself: Am I better because of them? And are they better because of me?”

As I reflected on my own relationship, her words stuck. Am I growing? Is my partner? Are we building each other up or holding each other back?

Your dreams and your love life are not enemies.

This was the part of our conversation that stayed with me the longest. My mom reminded me that ambition and relationships aren’t inherently at odds. “In my time, women were often made to choose — love or career. But your generation doesn’t have to.”

She explained that a healthy relationship should be a safe space, not a cage. “If the person you’re with truly loves you, they’ll celebrate your dreams as if they’re their own. But you have to do the same for them. Don’t let your ambition overshadow theirs.”

It made me think about my boyfriend and how often I talk about my startup, my ideas, my goals — but rarely ask about his with the same intensity. Her words reminded me that relationships are about shared victories.

I asked her how she navigated tough times in her relationship, and her response was straightforward:

“You can’t love someone into being better. That’s not your job.”

She went on to say, “I’ve seen too many women waste years trying to change a man who doesn’t want to change. It’s not about giving up on people; it’s about recognizing your limits. Love doesn’t mean setting yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.”

Her words were a reality check for me — and for many women I know. We often romanticize the idea of being the person who helps someone “become their best self.” But what she said made me realize that love is about supporting each other’s growth, not forcing it.

Independence doesn’t mean isolation.

As someone who’s fiercely independent, this one hit close to home. “Don’t confuse being self-sufficient with shutting people out,” she told me. “The strongest people I know aren’t the ones who do everything alone — they’re the ones who know when to ask for help.”

This advice made me reflect on how I sometimes struggle to open up about my challenges. Whether it’s with my boyfriend, friends, or even my team at work, I often convince myself that showing vulnerability is a weakness. But my mom’s words reminded me that true strength comes from connection.

Be careful of trends disguised as empowerment.

This was one of her most critical points.

“Feminism is powerful,” she said, “but be cautious of anything that makes you lose your sense of self.”

She explained how some movements, though well-intentioned, can encourage competition instead of collaboration. “Empowerment isn’t about proving you’re better than anyone else — it’s about creating space for everyone to thrive.”

Her words made me think about how easy it is to get caught up in proving ourselves, especially in the age of social media. We post our accomplishments, share our highs, and sometimes forget that true empowerment is quiet, not loud.

You can have it all, but not all at once.

This one was a hard pill to swallow. “There’s a lot of pressure on women today to excel in everything — career, relationships, personal growth — but remember, it’s okay to pace yourself.”

She emphasized that life is long, and different seasons will bring different priorities. “Right now, you’re focused on your startup. Later, it might be your relationship, or your health, or something else entirely. Don’t let the world rush you into thinking you have to master it all at once.”

At the end of the day, love and respect are what matter most.”

Her final piece of advice was simple yet profound: “Everything comes down to love and respect — both for yourself and the people around you.”

She reminded me that feminism isn’t just about fighting for rights; it’s about fostering relationships where everyone feels valued. “Whether it’s your partner, your friends, or your colleagues, ask yourself: Am I treating them with the same love and respect I want for myself?”

Her words felt like a gentle nudge to always keep perspective, even when life feels overwhelming.