I Used to Fear Feminism. Here’s Why I Was Dead Wrong.
Hey there, Buckle up, because I’m about to get real vulnerable with you all.
Two years ago, if you’d asked me about feminism, I’d have rolled my eyes so hard they might’ve gotten stuck. Yeah, I was that guy. The one who’d mutter “not all men” under his breath and share those cringy memes about “feminazis.”
But here’s the thing: I was scared. Terrified, actually. And I know I’m not the only one.
So, let’s dive into why feminism used to freak me out, and how I realized I was being an absolute idiot.
1. I thought feminists were coming for my job
Real talk: When I heard about pushing for more women in tech (my field), I panicked. I imagined hordes of women stealing “my” opportunities.
Reality check: Diversity in tech has made our teams stronger and more innovative. My company’s profits are up, and guess what? I still have a job. Actually, I got promoted last year.
2. I was terrified of being “canceled”
Every time I saw a story about some dude getting called out for sexist behavior, I’d break into a cold sweat. What if I accidentally said the wrong thing?
Plot twist: Turns out, most feminists aren’t out for blood. They just want people to listen and do better. I’ve had some uncomfortable conversations, sure. But they’ve made me a better person, colleague, and friend.
3. Dating seemed like a minefield
I was convinced feminism meant the death of romance. No more opening doors or paying for dinner? What’s a guy to do?
Spoiler alert: My current girlfriend is a proud feminist, and our relationship is the healthiest I’ve ever had. We communicate openly, split costs when it makes sense, and yes, I still open doors sometimes (because I want to, not because I have to).
4. I felt blamed for all of society’s problems
Every time I heard about the patriarchy, it felt like a personal attack. I’m just trying to live my life, you know?
Eye-opener: Learning about systemic issues doesn’t mean I’m personally to blame for everything. But I can be part of the solution. Small actions add up.
5. I was scared of losing my “manliness”
Feminism seemed to be attacking everything I thought made me a man. Sports, beer, grilling… was nothing sacred?
Reality: Feminism actually freed me from a lot of bulls**t expectations. I can enjoy a craft beer and a yoga class in the same day. I’m a more well-rounded person now.
So, what changed? Honestly, it was exhausting being angry all the time. I started actually listening to the women in my life. I read some books. I had some tough conversations.
And you know what? The world didn’t end. I didn’t lose my “man card” (whatever that means). I gained perspective, empathy, and some amazing friendships.
Here’s the kicker: Fighting against feminism was like swimming against the current. Once I stopped, once I opened my mind just a little… life got so much better.
I’m not saying I’m perfect now. I still mess up sometimes. But I’m trying, I’m learning, and I’m not afraid anymore.
To my fellow dudes out there: Feminism isn’t the enemy. It’s not coming to destroy you. It’s an invitation to be part of creating a better world for everyone. And trust me, it’s worth it.
So, what do you think? Has your view on feminism evolved over time? Drop a comment below — let’s keep this conversation going. And if you found this helpful, give it a clap or a share. We could all use a little more understanding in this world.