This is a story about my friend’s unexpected journey through the world of Big Tech. Despite the prestige, high pay, and admiration from others, she discovered that success at a giant like Google wasn’t what it seemed. This is her story of feeling lost, navigating office politics, and making a bold decision to walk away — reminding us that sometimes, even those at the top are struggling too.
Life has a way of flipping our expectations upside down. We’re told that being jobless is the worst fate and that landing a big tech job is the golden ticket to happiness. But reality isn’t always so simple. It turns out, even those working at tech giants — companies we’re all in awe of — can feel just as lost as anyone else.
The Day She Walked Out of Google in 10 Minutes
Just yesterday, I went to visit a friend of mine at Google. She’s an APM, one of the most prestigious roles in the tech world with a 0.6% global acceptance rate. You’d think she’d be riding high on success, right? Inbox flooded with admiration, a salary to match the prestige, and endless perks. But when I saw her, something was off. She was worn out, drained from navigating the labyrinth of office politics and corporate values that didn’t align with her own.
“I can’t do this anymore,” she confessed. “I just want out.”
We took a 10-minute break to meditate and clear her head. And just like that, after the meditation, she dropped a bombshell.
“I’m going to see my therapist about taking a medical leave.”
Wait, what? All that clarity from a 10-minute meditation? Before I could even process, she was off, getting signatures, notifying her team, and wrapping everything up within three hours. I was in shock. But maybe that’s what happens when people are truly lost — they act in ways that seem sudden, even crazy.
A Miserable Decade at Microsoft
This morning, I met up with another friend — an ex-Microsoft employee who spent 10 long years working in machine learning. When I told him about my Google friend’s sudden departure, he just nodded, like he’d heard it all before.
“Yeah, I was miserable too,” he said. “And pretty much everyone I know in Big Tech feels the same way.”
But here’s the kicker: “At least with Big Tech, you’re financially stable and miserable, not broke and miserable,” he added with a bitter laugh. Financial comfort, it seems, isn’t enough to keep the misery at bay.
I asked him what he planned to do next. His answer? He didn’t know. This guy was older, more experienced, and yet just as lost as the rest of us. Age, it turns out, doesn’t bring certainty. It seems we’re all just wandering through life, hoping to stumble upon something that makes us feel whole.
The Myth of a Fulfilling Life
Here’s the real kicker. We spend our lives chasing the things society tells us are important — money, status, the perfect job. And when we get there? It’s often nothing like what we expected.
All the free food, generous salaries, and supposedly “chill” work environments can’t fill the void if the work itself doesn’t align with who you are. So, what’s the point of all this climbing? What really makes a fulfilling life?
I dropped out of university the moment I realized that the path society had set out for me wasn’t mine. And over time, I’ve come to understand that only I can define what fulfillment looks like for myself. No one else. The unknowns might be terrifying, the path less traveled might be isolating, but every step I take feels like it’s mine. And that, in itself, is fulfilling.
Embracing the Chaos
I’m still lost, but I’ve learned to love the unpredictability. I want to explore, experience, and discover the endless possibilities that life has to offer. I’m scared, sure. But I’m also excited. What will happen next? Who knows — but isn’t that part of the adventure?
I’ve stopped fighting the chaos. Instead, I’m embracing it. Life may not always follow a clear script, but maybe that’s what makes it beautiful. Every twist, every unexpected turn, it’s all part of a bigger story — my story.
Now, let me leave you with this: earlier today, I delivered a quirky, self-made intro website to the door of a company I’m applying to. No email, no LinkedIn message, just a fun, slightly creepy invitation to come play and enjoy this unpredictable journey with me.
Who knows? Maybe that’s where the real magic happens — in the moments we decide to play with life instead of trying to control it.